That’s it, you think you have found a person who could match you. As you meet, you start to get attached to this person and then… STOP! Let’s not go too fast.
To avoid wasting time, disappointment and injury, you must learn to manage and control your emerging feelings as well as possible. Here are some tips to help you.
How to manage your feelings?
1. Talk about this relationship with God
We don’t teach you anything. Any relationship should start with times of prayer, especially if you feel you are beginning to bond with the person. It is very important to ask God if she is destined to stay in your life or if, on the contrary, she is not the person He has reserved for you.
2. Don’t get carried away
You met someone and that’s a good thing. But do not get carried away right away at the risk of suffering great disappointment. There is no point in already imagining a common future. The number of children you want, you will discuss later! To start a relationship, it is very important to keep your feet on the ground and not to go too fast.
There is no point talking about this man as the love of your life to your girlfriends. Gentlemen, there’s no point in telling your friends that you want her married either. Many relationships fail because they have moved too quickly. The two people didn’t take enough time to get to know each other before committing.
3. Not declaring your feelings
If the feelings are nascent, it is still too early to declare them. Sharing one’s feelings to another remains a big statement. What if your feelings weren’t reciprocated? Take your time before telling this person how you feel. Think about how you will express yourself. Even if it doesn’t commit you to anything, declaring your feelings is a big step forward in the relationship.
4. Know what the other thinks of you
Part of managing feelings is also knowing how the other person feels about you. Wait for him or her to talk to you about it or start the discussion to find out where this person is. You have to be on the same wavelength. Having feelings for someone when it’s not reciprocated can be very difficult to manage and even very painful…
5. Not making this person a priority
If you become attached to someone and start giving them first place, be sure that you will start to develop feelings faster than expected. It’s important to manage the time you spend with each other, especially in the early stages of a relationship. No need to see you and talk to you 24/7, at least not from the start. You risk getting attached too quickly…
6. Self-control without closing in
Managing your feelings also means sorting out what to share and what should remain secret. It is not a question of shutting oneself up completely and letting a distant and cold attitude show through. How will this person get to know you if they have to face a wall? Know how to be wise and measured. You shouldn’t reveal yourself too much, but you shouldn’t contain yourself too much either.
Dealing with your feelings can seem difficult or even impossible. But the Holy Spirit can help you be discerning, wise, and balanced. If you feel like you’re getting wrapped up in a relationship that might not be approved by God, don’t hesitate to distance yourself and ask the Lord to help you keep your feet on the ground.