My Lycan Luna Chapter 23: Forgiveness
It’s been a couple of days since the barbeque. I have taken it upon myself to check the perimeter once in the morning and once at night before going to bed. In the morning, I go with my brothers and Alondra and at night I go with Colin. Yashira confirmed everything Colin had told me about being under dark magic and I believe them, but it doesn’t change that he has a daughter with Tara.
The day of the barbeque, when Colin said they were going to get a few things for Xavier’s room, I thought he was going to get like a cute little lamp and a few toys, but what I saw the next day had me floored. Between Colin, his dads, his grandpa, my dad, and brothers, they bought him a whole new room and the theme was cars, not to mention all the toys. To say Xavier was excited was an understatement.
Colin and I have k!ssed here and there but nothing else. He wants to give me room until I’m comfortable after what happened. I know, I know it wasn’t his fall that he was under dark magic, but I can’t seem to get the picture out of my mind from when I saw him pounding into Tara. So, I have been thinking about talking to Yashira about it. Maybe she could give me something to forget that specific moment. Noah also talked to Colin. I was there and he told Colin everything he told me and then some. Colin said that he could give him a chance and let him out. That he would be on probation for three months and if he proved himself to not be a threat to the pack or us, that he could join our pack. Noah asked Colin if, after the probation, he could work in the pack clinic and Colin agreed.
I’m currently sitting in the back yard by the tree line with Elijah, dad, and Xavier. They are drinking some juice since they were running around. I see the back door to the pack house open and my eyes go to Colin’s daughter, Monica.
They arrived early this morning and I’ve been keeping away from them, but somehow the little girl seems to be everywhere. She started to walk and I noticed that she was walking slower than usual and with a slight limp. She looks around and her eyes land on us. I know dad and Elijah are watching her as well. She slowly makes her way towards us.
“It’s way too hot for her to be wearing a long sleeve turtle neck” Elijah says. It’s true. Ever since she came back she has been wearing a purple long sleeve turtle neck and kids sweat pants.
“Hello” she says, looking down. I can smell her fear. A child should not fear anything or anyone. They should feel safe around the people they know. I saw her look at Xavier since he was eating some cookies and drinking a juice box. I haven’t touched mine, so, I offered it to her.
“Would you like a juice and cookies?” I asked and her eyes locked with mine, knocking the breath out of me. Not because she has my mate’s eyes, but because of the fear I see in them. My mom’s instincts kick in and I smile softly at her. I extended my hand for her to take it.
“It’s okay, you can have a seat here next to Xavy” I smiled. She took a step and a tear streamed down her chubby cheek. I looked at dad, then at Elijah. Xavy got up and took her hand.
“It’s okay. Don’t cry” Xavy said, gently wiping her tears. My little boy is so sweet.
“Xavy, this is Monica, she’s your little sister” I said, making Xavy look at her, then at me.
“Sister?” he echoes.
“Yes, daddy is also her daddy” I said to Xavy. What I saw and heard next made my heart swell with pride.
“I your big brother. I protect you like uncles protect mommy”, Xavy said to Monica. The look in her eyes was one of… relief? Xavy opened his arms and Monica hugged Xavy, but when Xavy hugged her, Monica whimpered and jumped away from Xavy.
“Are you okay sweetheart?” I asked. She looked around, then back at the pack house, the fear returning in her eyes. I could see she was sweating.
“Are you hot sweetheart? Come on, I’ll help you take off that turtle neck” I said.
“M-mommy said k-keep” she stammered.
“It’s too hot, but it’s okay. I won’t tell mommy you took it off for a little bit. It’s our little secret. Promise” I said. Monica smiled at me and nodded her head. I helped her take the turtle neck off. I heard dad and Elijah gasp. When I looked down, I saw why. This poor little girl was covered in bruises. I believe the only places she didn’t have bruises were on her face and hands.
“Come here sweetheart” I said. She obediently came to me and I lifted her regular shirt. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Faith and I were furious. No child should have these nor any types of bruises or marks on their bodies. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and took a few pictures before putting it back in my pocket.
“Monica, who did this to you?” I asked her softly, handing her a cookie.
“Momma” she said. This was it. Tara needed to learn a lesson.
“I’m going to get some more cookies. You can stay here with Uncle Eli, grandpa Luke, and Xavy. They will protect you”, I told her. She looks at dad and Elijah and they both nod. She gives them a cute smile before sitting down next to Xavy, but not before wincing in pain. Dad and Elijah got up.
“Where are you going?” Elijah asked.
“I don’t care that she’s Tara and Colin’s daughter, she’s a child. No child should go through whatever she just went through. I’m going to deal with this. Tara had it coming. Don’t let her leave your sight”, I said, then walked away. Once inside the pack house, I sniffed the air, picking up Tara’s stench. I followed it to Colin’s office. I was furious and the fact that she was in there with him and the door was closed, it made me even angrier.
“Please, Alpha-” I growled as I opened the door with such force that I believed it made a whole on the wall.
“Kitten”, Colin calls, but my attention is all on Tara. She has this smug look on her face.
“Oh, babe, you can tell her now that she’s here. No better yet, let me. I’m going to be the new Luna since I have a daughter with the Alpha”, Tara grinned.
“WHAT?! Are you insane?” Colin shouts at Tara.
“Kitten, that’s not true” Colin says.
“I know” was the only thing I said to him, then turned my attention back to Tara and I growled at her.
“You think you’re all big and bad, don’t you?” I asked as I stalked towards her like she’s my prey.
“I’m the best at what I do” she smirks.
“Really? Good, because so am I”. I snarled, then grabbed her by her hair and pulled her out of the office.
“Kitten, what are you doing?” Colin asks. I made my way out the front of the pack house.
“Let me go you b!tch”, Tara shrieks, trying to pry my hands away from her hair, but to no avail. Outside, people see us and start coming towards us to see what’s going on.
“Angel, please tell me what’s going on?” Colin pleads. I took out my phone, opened it and threw it at him.
“Check the pictures” I said and shoved Tara to the floor.
“Have you lost your mind? This is Gucci” she says, standing up and brushing off her dress. Using my gift, I created a large circle of fire around us. She was not getting away from me and no one was going to interfere.
“What’s this? Colin, please-”
“You think you’re some big and bad person because you beat your daughter until she’s black and blue? What kind of mother beats her child like that?” I growled. I heard a roar and I knew it was Colin.
“What the fvck did you do to my daughter?” he roared.
“You want to beat on someone? Beat me, just know I’m going to hit back” I said, taking a step towards her. I watched her take a step back, almost touching the fire.
“You don’t want to do that. I don’t think you want to be burnt alive. That will be an agonizing death”, I lied, but just for the effect, I brought my hand up a little, making the flames get hotter and higher. She would just suffer bad burns but she didn’t need to know that.
“You have no idea who you’re messing with” she growled and threw a punch, but I stepped to the side. I took this chance to punch her once in her face and once in the ribs. I heard a rib or two cracks, maybe a break. She growled at me and shifted into her wolf form. Since she’s not part of this pack, she’s not going through the transition of acceptance to becoming a Lycan. She lunged at me, going straight for my neck, but I dropped, bringing my legs up and pushed her off with her own momentum. I quickly stood and used my Lycan strength and began punching all over her wolf’s body. She managed to turn her body and bit my arm, so I punched her hard on the side of the head, making her let go.
‘Let me at her’ Faith said.
‘Fine, just don’t kill her. I’m sure Colin has some questions for her’, I said, giving Faith control. I sat back and just watched as Faith shifted and began to claw at her. Her wolf whimpered and tried to bite Faith, but Faith moved just in time.
“Watch out Faith”, I heard Colin shout, but it was too late. Dirt is in my eyes. Faith runs her paw over her eyes.
‘b!tch’, Faith growled.
‘I feel her, she’s coming up on our right. Finish this’, I told Faith. Just then, we saw a blur in midair. Faith brings her claws out, grabbing Tara and slamming her as hard as she can to the ground without killing her. Faith gives me control and I shift back to my human form and so does Tara. I rub my eyes with my left hand while my right hand is still wrapped around Tara’s neck. Once I can see better, I wave a hand letting the circle of fire around us vanish.
“You don’t deserve to be a mother. Especially to a sweet little girl like Monica” I growled; my voice laced with Faith’s. I let go of her neck and stood. Colin takes off his shirt and hands it to me and I quickly put it on.
“Beta Ray, take Tara to the dungeons. No food or water until I say so” Colin said using his Alpha voice.
“No, no you can’t do this to me. I’m the mother of your daughter”, Tara shouts as Ray drags her away.
“You’re going to be sorry for this and everything else. You should have stayed away b!tch”, Tara snarls, but I ignored her.
“Where is Monica now?” Colin asks.
“With my dad, Elijah, and Xavier in the back yard” I said. He looked torn between going with me or going to his daughter.
“I’m fine, go to your daughter” I said before walking away from him and going to our room. I walked into the room and go to the shower. I looked at my arm where Tara had bit me, but it was already healed. I turn on the shower, put my hair up in a messy bun, and get in. I washed my body, shaved, and washed my body again. Once I finished, I got out of the shower and dried myself. I wrapped a towel around myself and walked out of the room and went to the walk in closet. I grabbed one of Colin’s t-shirts, some leggings, Mrs. River gave me and I put on my underwear. Once I was dressed, I walked out of the closet just as the door opened. Colin walked in with Xavier and Monica.
“Dinner is ready”, Colin informed me. I nodded and put on my flip flops. Xavier put up his arms, wanting his dad to pick him up. He didn’t have his nap today, so I know he was already tired. Colin picked Xavier up, but what took me by surprise was when Monica slipped her little hand in mine. I looked at our hands before I looked at Colin, only to see a soft smile on his face. I took a deep breath and we walked down the stairs and went to the dining room. I made sure that Xavier and Monica were seated before I got their plates. We are having chicken parmesan tonight. I cut up Xavier and Monica’s chicken and gave them their juices. I then walked towards Yashira.
“Yashira, can I speak to you for a second please?” I asked and she nodded, quickly getting up. We went to the kitchen where there was no one.
“Is everything okay?” she asks.
“No, I was wondering if you’re able to take a memory from me” I said.
“What memory?” she asked.
“The one where I walked in on Colin and Tara at the hotel” I said.
“Even if I did it, the memory would return every time you look at Monica” Yashira said. I looked down at my hands.
“Tristan is not my real son. His mother died while he was still in her belly. Gabriel had to claw him out of her. When I met Tristan, he was three years old and he was so sweet that I instantly fell in love with him. I always had this feeling of wanting to protect him and that’s what I did. I loved him, cared for him, and protected him. I loved and still do like he’s my own blood”, she says, taking my hand in hers.
“I know it’s difficult to know that the man you love, your mate, mated another and they have a child together, but understand that that wasn’t Colin. I mean it was him, but he was under dark magic. Colin-” she stopped and shook her head.
“I think it’s better for you to see it than to hear it. May I?” she asked and I nodded as she placed her hand on my forehead. Her eyes glowed just as my head shot back. I could see how Colin was when he was in the elevator with Tara. Suddenly, I felt everything he felt and I could hear what he was saying. How him and his wolf, Xan, were trying to fight to get control of his body before anything happened. I felt a pain in my neck. I could see and feel how devastated he was when everything ended. I saw and felt how it hurt him to know what he had just done. I felt the hatred he had for Tara and the love he had for his daughter. I felt the fear of him losing me. How he hated himself for what happened even though everyone would tell him that it wasn’t his fault. I watched how almost every night he would cry and scream out my name and how much he loved me. I watched as he went to the waterfall and sometimes even thought about ending it all. But most of all, I heard as he prayed to the moon goddess for me to be safe wherever I was and that if I ever returned, to find it in my heart to forgive him.
The vision fades and I blink a few times to adjust my vision. I realized I had been crying. I looked at Yashira to see a sad smile on her face.
“The only time I ever saw him smile was when he held his daughter and sometimes I felt like it was forced. The day you came back, the whole pack could feel a change within the pack link. I know it’s hard, but you have to look within your heart to find out what you should do. What you did today, Angel, it was something that none of us ever thought we would see”, Yashira said.
“I did what anyone else would do to protect a child” I said.
“No, not everyone is the same. Not everyone thinks like you. Your mother’s instincts kicked in. You stood up for Monica, who is just a year and a half, before anyone else could. I watched as you walked in the dining room with her and she was smiling. She looked carefree for once”, Yashira said. As I take in what she said, I take a deep breath, then nod. I feel Faith pop her head up knowing my answer.
“Thank you Yashira”, I hugged her before going back to the dining room. I sat down next to Xavy. Colin is feeding Monica, who grabs a hand full of spaghetti and puts it in her mouth while a lot of sauce drops onto her shirt. Xavier is no better, as his uncle Elijah feeds him.
“Mommy, watch Minions?” Xavier asks.
“You need a good bath first, buddy. How did you get spaghetti sauce in your ear?” I asked, grabbing the napkin and cleaning him. I hear people chuckle around. We all eat and make light conversation. After dinner, I took Xavier to his room and start making his bath. Once the water is at a good temperature and he has his bubbles, I go to his room, only to see Colin and Monica there. She still has spaghetti sauce on her face and even her hair. Colin looks at me and bites his bottom lip.
“You don’t have to, but I was wondering if… um… you could help me” he said. I knew why he was asking me and I didn’t have a problem helping him.
“Sure. You take Xavier” I said, making him smile.
“Thank you. Her clothes and shampoo are in our room” he said, and I nodded. I extended my hand and she took it. Colin began to undress Xavier as I left the room. In our bathroom, I got the tub ready for Monica. Yashira had healed Monica, so all her bruises were gone now. Once the bath was ready, I undressed her.
“Up you go” I said, making her giggle. I couldn’t help but smile. I washed her hair with the shampoo and conditioner, then I washed her body.
“Pwetty” Monica said, bringing her little hand up and touching my cheek.
“Thank you. You are very beautiful too” I said. Faith pushed forward, watching us. I felt my eyes flash. Monica brought her little hand up to my eyes and I closed them.
“Pwetty” she said, removing her hand, and I smiled. I brought up my hand and she closed her eyes.
“Yours are beautiful” I said, making her smile.
“Alright, let’s get you out before you start to look like a raisin”, I chuckled, letting out the water from the tub. I grabbed a towel and got her out. I dried her hair and body before putting on her pajamas. I put her dirty clothes in the basket as she walked out the bathroom.
“Daddy” she squealed.
“Wow, your hair is not red anymore” Colin chuckled as I walked out.
“Thank you” he said, looking at me.
“I brought up the Minion movie so we can watch it together” he said.
“Sounds good”, I smiled. He got the DVD ready and I put Xavier on the bed. Monica put her arms up for me to also put her on the bed and I did. We started to watch the movie. The kids were between Colin and me. The kids were laughing at the minions all the time because of the way they talked. After the movie finished, I took Xavier to his room and, to my surprise, Monica wanted to sleep in the room with him and Xavier scooted over, leaving her some space. Colin told them a story before he k!ssed them both and said good night.
“Night mommy. I love you” Xavier said.
“I love you too, my little prince” I said, k!ssing his forehead. I then k!ssed Monica’s forehead as well.
“Good night princess” I said, then walked out of the room, to the room I shared with Colin. I took off my leggings and laid down on the bed.
“You’re good with her” he said. I had no idea what to say so I stayed quiet. He turned off the light and scrolled through the TV. He found a movie and we both started to watch it, but I couldn’t concentrate on the movie. I sat on the bed criss crossed and took a deep breath.
“I went to Yashira for help earlier” I said, making him look at me.
“I wanted help to see if she could… to see if she could help me forget that night at the hotel” I admitted. Colin looked sad for a second.
“What did she say?” he asks.
“That there was no guarantee that it would work because I will always remember it when I see Monica” I said and he nodded.
“I’m sorry, my love. If I could take it back I would-” I put a hand up, stopping him from talking.
“In my life I learned that everything happens for a reason. Who knows, maybe this was supposed to happen to test our relationship. I’m not going to lie, when I found you and Tara… I felt like my heart shattered in a million pieces. I wanted to come back before, but just the thought of seeing you hurt”. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
“Yashira showed me what you went through after I left the hotel, but I just didn’t see it; I felt it and heard everything you went through and I’m sorry you had to go through all that. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you” I said, looking at Colin.
“You have nothing to be sorry for” he said, taking my hand in his.
“I do and I’m sorry. Also… I forgive you for what happened between you and Tara. It wasn’t your fault and it’s no right that I continue to hold it against you. You deserve a better mate. I’m sorry you got stuck with me” I said, looking down in shame.
“Hey” he said, cupping my chin so I could look at him, “I’m beyond happy you forgive me, but I’m blessed to have a bada*ss, beautiful, kind, lovable, loyal, and faithful mate like you. I wouldn’t ask for anyone else. I gave you my heart, body, and soul. I waited for you and, just like you gave me your v!rginity, I also gave you mine. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. You are the woman I love and the only woman I will ever love. You are my beautiful, sweet angel”, he said, and pulled me in for a k!ss. The k!ss was sweet and short, but it showed what he felt for me. When we pulled apart, he k!ssed my forehead and turned off the TV. We both laid down. He pulled me to him and I laid my head on his chest. He k!ssed my forehead and for the first time in a while my mind was blank.
“I love you Angel” he said.
“I love you too, Colin” I replied. I closed my eyes feeling the darkness pulling me in, but not before I heard Colin whisper, “my angel.”